It seems like a silly thing to say, but I don’t know if I have actually explained a lot about alopecia. Other than how much it sucks, or what it effects, I don’t know if I have really explained how it works for me. Because it’s different for everyone. Good old Wikipedia says: “Alopecia areata (AA) is a health condition in which hair is lost from some or all areas of the body, usually from the scalp. Thank you Wikipedia. Some people refer to Alopecia as AA, but I choose not too because I believe the world has enough acronyms as it is, and making an acronym for a very uncommon thing seems really, well, dumb. Also, I don’t know what “areata” means, so I never call my alopecia, alopecia areata. Just like the title of my blog, alo-what? I tend to lose people after the word alopecia comes out of my mouth, let alone adding areata to the end of that. Anyhow, there are 3 types of alopecia.
1. Alopecia Areata - which is small, bald spots on the scalp.
2. Alopecia Totalis - loss of all hair on the scalp
3. Alopecia Universalis - loss of all body hair.
My alopecia seems to be a “severe case of alopecia areata” because I am not (contrary to popular belief) completely bald. I have little fuzz patches, they look like small continents that don’ t want to connect to each other. Also there is a very smooth ocean between these continents. Most of these fuzzy patches are at the very top of my head. Alopecia can affect more places than just your head. I haven’t shaved my legs since before Christmas, and don't worry...they are bare. Except for an annoying little patch on both of my knees! And I always forget about those two little patches, and when I start doing crunches at the gym I try to make a mental note to shave them but I always forget. My arm hair is gone too, although I never had tons of hair on them before. And, the most bizarre in my opinion, the hair on the left side of my upper lip has vanished! That one is the most humourous because nobody would ever notice it.
Wikipedia also says that the bald spots might be “slightly painful”. I would say that my head only hurts when I am getting the needles. The needles. I’m struggling dealing with them. It’s just that they hurt so much. And they may not fix anything permanently. Whenever I stop getting them, any new hair could easily fall out again, leaving me back at square one. Lotions and creams I can deal with, but the needles bug me. Somehow I think the problem needs to be fixed internally. If I can’t add steroids to my body for the rest of my life in order to have a full head of hair, then I want to figure out what to fix in my body to let the hair be normal. The thing is, I don’t know where to start. It’s just hard. Sitting through these sessions where I get stuck with all these needles, and thinking that maybe they won’t even help in the long run. In the big picture, they might be a waste of time. A painful waste of time. And even though I am getting these painful treatments, I don’t have too much to show for it. I still wear Jimmy all the time. Although I have patches growing back, they aren’t consistent. I know everything takes time, but how much time is enough time to judge whether or not I have given this treatment a fair shot? I know I am the judge of what treatment I want, but all I really want is to know where this alopecia of mine is going. But it’s 100% unpredictable. So much subconscious stress is caused by knowing that there is no way to know what will happen. I just have to let it go. But sometimes I feel that doing the shots is preventing me from letting it go. I can’t read my own feelings!
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